Thursday, April 16, 2020

Survey of Economics Essays - Economy, Business, Monopoly

Survey of Economics Professor Thomas Andrew Lett Salem International University October 22nd, 2017 Barriers to entry into an industry or business are economies of scale, product differentiation, capital requirements, switching costs and government policies. Some other barriers include cost disadvantages and access to distribution channels. Start up business may look to enter business with high barriers which will be hard to overcome. Economies of scale are decreasing unit costs of a product. This will force an entrant to either come in at a large or small scale. Entering at large scale would be risky as incumbents would have major reactions to it causing the entry to be a failure. Small scale entry may result in small scale disadvantages in cost. Product differentiation is where companies have established brand loyalties which in result forces entrants to have to spend mass amounts to overcome the issue. Marketing resources will be needed as the small start-up will need them to establish effective positioning.Capital requirements are required for infrastructure, machinery, RD, and advertising. Startups can get around these financial resources by outsourcing to companies. Government policies are a major barrier as they force you to obey them. If not, fines and loss of business will be the result. Regulations are ever changing and many things require special licenses to obtain equipment or sell certain products. This makes it very hard for startups to succeed. Reference(s): Barriers to entry: factors preventing startups entry to a market. (n.d.). Retrieved October 22, 2017, from https://www.marsdd.com/mars-library/barriers-to-entry-factors-preventing-startups-from-entering-a-market/

Thursday, March 12, 2020

Sample Short Answer on Soccer for Common Application

Sample Short Answer on Soccer for Common Application College applications often include a short essay that asks you to elaborate on your most meaningful extracurricular activity or work experience. The Common Application used to require a short answer response of 150 words or fewer, and today many schools have retained the short answer in the supplemental essay section. The question will often ask something straight-forward like this: Briefly elaborate on one of your extracurricular activities or work experiences. Features of a Weak Short Answer The short answer repeats similar ideas in slightly different words.The essay employs vague language.The response is filled with clichà ©s and predictable language.The response doesnt explain why the activity is important to the author. Short should not be confused with unimportant. When a college has holistic admissions, every piece of the application is important since the admissions folks want to get to know you as a whole person. The short answer needs to convey your passion for something you do, and it should also explain why the activity is important to you. In this sample short answer response, Gwen writes about her passion for soccer, but she makes many common mistakes in the process. Sample Short Answer Response by Gwen Simply put, I love soccer. I love being part of a team of girls who go out there and give their all, heart and soul, in every game. We truly are a family in our team. I love being a part of that family and taking a leadership role, both on and off the field. Soccer has also helped me be a better leader in student organizations and class work, where I take a proactive role. Whether it is a good defensive block or scoring the winning goal, soccer is an empowering part of my life, and I would not be the person I am today without it. Critique of Gwens Short Answer Response Gwens short answer response is not terrible- the language is easy to read and Gwens love of soccer comes across forcefully. However, Gwens response does have several problems: The language is repetitive. Gwen says I love three times, and she repeats the ideas of family and leadership twice.The languge is vague. What does Gwen mean when she says she takes a proactive role? What is her leadership role? What exactly does she mean when she says soccer made her the person I am today?Some language is clichà ©. Phrases like heart and soul and scoring the winning goal appear in far too many essays about sports.The response is short and doesnt say much. The typical 150-word limit isnt much space in which to elaborate on an activity, yet Gwens response is just 540 characters/108 words (and, as noted, those words are repetitive and vague). Gwen hasnt used the short answer to her advantage. Gwen does sound like a perfectly pleasant and enthusiastic student who works well with a team, but her response could be so much stronger. We finish her short answer response without a clear sense of the type of leader she is or what leadership roles she has assumed. Theres nothing concrete here to illustrate how soccer has made her a stronger person and better student. A Final Word on Short Answer Responses To see what a stronger short answer response looks like, be sure to check out Christies essay on running and Joels response on his job at Burger King. Christies response shows how an athletic activity can be presented more effectively than Gwen does, and Joel shows how a relatively unenjoyable activity- a fast food job- can still prove meaningful and valuable. Dont be misled by the word short. You should put plenty of time and care into this type of little essay. Work to follow the guidelines for a winning short answer, and be sure to steer clear of common short answer mistakes.

Tuesday, February 25, 2020

Vision of the type of organization that will be needed in the future Essay

Vision of the type of organization that will be needed in the future - Essay Example This paper will describe this kind of organization considering that people as a product and the notion of talent in relation to the workforce as the greatest resource and asset of the organization. It is evident from studies that having the best people in an organization are not enough. The human resource practices are also vital in developing a visionary organization because it drives the operations of the business and exactly how it will be done. Hence the paper will also highlight the good human resource practices that the organization should employ. This is what makes the vision of the organization that will be needed in the future. A good organization begins from the top and works its operations down. An ideal organization that will be needed in future should have a strong and effective management that is aware of its mission and the mechanism of getting there. The management will composed of great and talented leaders who are ready for any impediments and obstacles that can com e there way and still be able to lead others in spite of the differences in opinions and personalities. The organization will have a united workforce with respect to their superiors, educated, and enjoys their duties in the organization. As a leader, I will hold a managerial position in such organization to drive the vision of the organization using my leadership skills and talents to unite the best people for the accomplishment of the vision (Lawler, 1998). The mission statement of the organization that will be needed in future is one that let people working in the organization know what the organization does, such vision statement has a loftier goal: it should showcase how the organization views the future. The vision of that particular organization will describe what the success of the organization would look like; the highest bar the organization always endeavor for. The organization will have both an ambitious and realistic vision statement, in other words, the vision statement should challenge the staff of the organization without overpowering them. This will ensure that performance benchmarks are created along with organizational objectives that are achievable (Barney, 2006). In the future, organizations that will be needed are those whose vision statements answers questions like â€Å"What would a world that do not need our kind of organization look like?† and â€Å"What would a perfect organization in the world look like?† such are the questions that drive change in the organization. That can only be achieved if the best people in the organization are united and work together as a team with a common goal. This type of vision unites and motivates people as a reminder that a lot of work is still pending unaccomplished. As the leader of the organization, I will use my talent to make decision on what makes sense of our organization. Occasionally, there is no particular vision statement that is intrinsically better than the other. That is why as a manager and a leader, one should be able to ascertain that which make the most sense to the organization, and that is what makes an organization exemplary. An exemplary organization, one that will be needed in the future and one organization I will be in and serve as a manger, must have a shared and an inspiring mission at its

Sunday, February 9, 2020

Evolution in the Workplace Essay Example | Topics and Well Written Essays - 2250 words

Evolution in the Workplace - Essay Example Whether this survival is by natural selection, or by clinging onto Jesus’ teachings, we were still created to rise to the top. But not everyone rises to the top in the same way. Not only do we not rise in the same way, we are not always chosen for the role we want in life. Our behavior seems to dictate who we will hang out with at lunch time during our high school years. We are guided by our behavior which orders us to determine how we will communicate with our professors in order to receive a passing grade in college. Our children learn to sweat talk us with â€Å"good† behavior when they want to go to a party or want us to change our minds about something already predetermined. Our behavior runs the show. The question isn’t whether we are good at convincing one another or choosing the right group of friends to associate ourselves with. The question is how hardwired is human behavior? (Nicholson, 1998, p. 135) Is it in our genes? Is it in our blood? Did God make us a certain way? Did evolution split us in a particular direction? So many questions with such a diverse amount of answers leads some to believe that it is through natural selection that we are able to stand on our own two feet and be successful in life, and in our workplace. But others, still, believe that from day one, we were made to be a certain way. This could be through creation or evolution. Evolution is not the belief that there is no intelligent design. It is the belief that things change and adapt from its particular origin. The origin can be different for each species and not even Charles Darwin claimed to know what the origin was. (Wright, 1994, pp. 1-10) He only claims that things evolve from one point to another. Evolution however, is not just one step and the theory is not as narrow as it may seem. The theory includes six different components which create the theory of evolution in its entirety. The six components are evolution, gradualism, speciation, common ancest ry, natural selection, and nonselective mechanism of evolutionary change. (Coyne, 2009, p. 3) Each of these parts means something important and are directly applied to determining which person is best fit for the job at hand. Evolution itself means that a particular species undergoes genetic change over time. Is this something that occurs in the workplace? Yes! Overtime, people learn how to please their â€Å"boss† or they are not rehired. For the manager, they learn to look for traits that is going to help grow their business, not shrink it. This is where the idea of modern Darwinism comes in. The new fields of science or psychology do not just come about. They evolve, and with its evolution come the ability to choose in a more purposeful way. Choosing who will work for you is so important because you do not want to be stuck with the thought that you will need to â€Å"fire† that person. Gradualism is the idea that it takes many years to produce the product of evoluti on. (Coyne, 2009, p. 4) In the workplace this means two things. The manager or the boss needs to have several bad apples before realizing what he really wants, and, improvement in the workforce comes over time. Competition adds to the search for the new and better improved resources that will help a company grow, and not extinguish itself. Part of this gradualism is allowing time for change. If the boss does not allow time for change, he or she will either not see change, or the change will

Thursday, January 30, 2020

Human Inheritance Essay Example for Free

Human Inheritance Essay Ethical dilemmas are constantly confronting healthcare professionals, which is difficult to deal with as there is no correct solution. These are also known as moral dilemmas as they are situations where there is more than two choices to make and none of the choices is certain to work and can cause complications. An example of this would be ‘You are a patient and are too sick to speak for yourself. You are concerned about who will make medical decisions on your behalf, and whether your wishes will be followed. You wonder, What if they disagree about what I would want, or what would be best for me? ’. Another example of this would be with the economic downturn that you may not be able to afford the funds for food and need to feed your family but the only way in doing this is to steal or let your family starve. These dilemmas are impossible because each person thinks differently and has a different feeling towards it. There are ethical dilemmas surrounding IVF and infertility. Infertility is a genetic problem that affects women; it is not the woman’s fault. With IVF the NHS only gives each woman one free cycle and after that she has to fund it herself. An ethical dilemma with IVF is the possible wrong that is done to the infertile couple or the expected child by the physician. The success of IVF depends on the number of embryos transferred to the woman’s uterus. Because the chance of survival of an embryo in IVF is small the more transfers made the greater the chance of the woman becoming pregnant, it also increases the risk of multiple pregnancies. IVF is not allowed by the Catholic Church because it separates the unitive and the procreative aspects of marriage. To separate the unitive and the procreative aspects of marriage is a mortal sin. In addition the sperm donor commits a mortal sin in order to harvest the sperm which is needed for IVF. Although one human life may be created through the IVF technique, many surplus foetuses, (unborn babies), are destroyed through this process. Other surplus unborn babies are left frozen in the laboratories where they were manufactured as though they were not human beings, but simply consumer goods. They were not created in love through the marriage act as God intends. Multiple births also create danger to the health and well-being of the child. Premature birth and low weight when born are also issues with this, also studies that have been undertaken spina bifida is at a higher risk with children made from IVF. Also the hormones that are taken by the female in order to become pregnant are always at risk of having problems or abnormalities to the unborn child. Aminiocentesis is another ethical dilemma, during the process if abnormalities are found the mother is offered the chance to terminate her pregnancy. The ethical issues surrounding amniocentesis are seen as centring on 4 focal points. First is the policy of the diagnostic treatment centre. Here, 2 questions arise: Is the client involved in a high-risk pregnancy? And, if a positive diagnosis is made, will the parents’ consent to an abortion? Second is the role of the genetic counsellor, which is seen as supportive rather than leading. He should assist the prospective parents in reaching a decision to undergo amniocentesis and possible abortion that is mutually acceptable. The prospective parents, the third focal point, may face the question of deciding what is normal. The clients must also realize the terrible strains that are put on a marriage into which a severely defective child has been born. The fourth focal point is public policy. While amniocentesis may appear to threaten some values held important in our society, the author regards the procedure as an interim solution on the road to an understanding of and ability to treat genetic defects. Contraception is another ethical dilemma as birth control operates before pregnancy begins, and until the sperm fertilises the egg there is nothing that is going to suffer loss and so the issue is very different from the case of abortion. And since the egg and sperm would cease to exist whether fertilisation takes place or not, they cant be said to suffer loss, either. Non-religious arguments about birth control are therefore concerned only with the rights of the parents and with the consequences for those parents and for society in general. The issue of possibly killing a person, and of the rights of the mother versus the rights of the foetus, which dominate the topic of abortion, do not arise. Some people think it’s wrong as it is wrong to interfere with the natural order of the universe. People in certain religions also see it as wrong because of the fact that it is like abortion as some birth control techniques can operate by preventing the implantation and development of a fertilized egg. Those opposed to such methods say that this amounts to an abortion, and that if abortion is wrong then those forms of contraception must also be wrong. http://brendakaren. wordpress. com/2009/04/15/some-moral-and-ethical-issues-concerning-ivf-techniques/ http://www. ncbi. nlm. nih. gov/pubmed/4418247 Contraception!!! http://www. bbc. co. uk/ethics/contraception/contraception_abortion. shtml

Wednesday, January 22, 2020

The Great Depression Essay -- Papers History New Deal Market Crash Ess

The Great Depression The great depression hit the nation quite hard with an un-comparable feeling of instability and weakness. The United States and other nations including Europe and Great Britain were quickly affected. The depression, caused by the fall of the stock market in 1929, caused many individuals to panic and the depression was everywhere by 1932. Many people were affected by the depression. Investors, the ordinary work force and consumers sank rapidly with the panic that spread across the world. The United States tried to gain security through several attempts at restoration. With the help of president Roosevelt and his attempt to restore security with The New Deal the nation would overcome the onset crisis. The ordinary people affected by the crisis experienced many forms of mass unemployment. As the workforce began to panic the anxiety grew stronger. The stress of unemployment and anxiousness forced thus individuals to look to the government for the answers. Governments quickly responded to the anxiety by raising taxes. Which in turn only seemed to make matters worse. The United States attempts at restoring the nation with confidence failed. Some believe that the main reason being that the United States had developed an enormous economy of mass production, but the larger picture consisted of analyzing more than the mass production. Instead there was a problem arising. How would the nation survive with a population of mass production and a decrease in consumption became the main question being analyzed. As the stock market crashed and the United States economy began to as well the U.S. government began to focus on the idea of every nation for themselves. The... ... New Deal solved the depression because it didn?t, but I think that it gave the nation the fundamentals that they needed to solve their problems themselves. All that was missing was the structure and strength in the citizens themselves to reunite as a nation and not as individuals. The New Deal helped many individuals perceive these morals and values by setting the standards for economic equality, limited production, and fairness for the rich and poor and it also provided equality in the field of competition. All in which were needed to be restored. After all we did create The Pledge of Allegiance, which plainly states the fundamentals of The United States by saying we are ?One nation under god, individual with liberty and justice for all.? Meaning justice for all people in our country and resembles the unity we should all feel in our nation together as a whole

Monday, January 13, 2020

Fool Chapter 8

EIGHT A WIND FROM FUCKING FRANCE Hunter was right, of course, he wasn't able to feed Lear's train. We imposed on villages along the way for fare and quarter, but north of Leeds the villages had suffered bad harvests and they could not bear our appetites without starving themselves. I tried to foster good cheer among the knights, while keeping distance from Lear – I had not forgiven the old man for disowning my Cordelia and sending away Drool. Secretly I relished the soldiers' complaints about their lack of comfort, and made no real effort to dampen their rising resentment for the old king. On the fifteenth day of our march, outside of Lint-upon-Tweed, they ate my horse. â€Å"Rose, Rose, Rose – would a horse by any other name taste so sweet?† the knights chanted. They thought themselves clever, slinging such jests while spraying roasted bits of my mount from their greasy lips. The dull always seek to be clever at the fool's expense, to somehow repay him for his cutting wit, but never are they clever, and often are they cruel. Which is why I may never own things, never care for anyone, nor show desire for anything, lest some ruffian, thinking he is funny, take it away. I have secret desires, wants, and dreams, though. Jones is a fine foil, but I should like someday to own a monkey. I would dress him in a tiny jester's suit, of red silk, I think. I would call him Jeff, and he would have his own scepter, that would be called Tiny Jeff. Yes, I should very much like a monkey. He would be my friend – and it would be forbidden to murder, banish, or eat him. Foolish dreams? We were met at the gate of Castle Albany by Goneril's steward, adviser, and chief toady, that most pernicious twat, Oswald. I'd had dealings with the rodent-faced muck-sucker when he was but a footman at the White Tower, when Goneril was still princess at court, and I, a humble jongleur, was found wandering naked amid her royal orbs. But that tale is best left for another time, the scoundrel at the gate impedes our progress. Spidery in appearance as well as disposition, Oswald lurks even when in the open, lurking being his natural state of locomotion. A fine black fuzz he wears for a beard, the same is on his head, when his blue tartan tam is humbled at his heart, which it was not that day. He neither removed his hat nor bowed as Lear approached. The old king was not pleased. He stopped the train an arrow-shot from the castle and waved me forward. â€Å"Pocket, go see what he wants,† said Lear. â€Å"And ask why there is no fanfare for my arrival.† â€Å"But nuncle,[24]† said I. â€Å"Shouldn't the captain of the guard be the one – â€Å" â€Å"Go on, fool! A point is to be made about respect. I send a fool to meet this rascal and put him in his place. Spare no manners, remind the dog that he is a dog.† â€Å"Aye, majesty.† I rolled my eyes at Captain Curan, who almost laughed, then stopped himself, seeing that the king's anger was real. I pulled Jones from my satchel and sallied forth, my jaw set, as determined as the prow of a warship. â€Å"Hail, Castle Albany,† I called. â€Å"Hail, Albany. Hail, Goneril.† Oswald said nothing, did not so much as remove his hat. He looked past me to the king, even when I was standing an arm's length from him. I said: â€Å"King of bloody Britain here, Oswald. I'd suggest you pay proper respect.† â€Å"I'll not lower myself to speak with a fool.† â€Å"Primping little whoreson wanker, innit he?† said the puppet Jones. â€Å"Aye,† said I. Then I spotted a guard in the barbican, looking down on us. â€Å"Hail, Cap'n, seems someone's emptied a privy on your drawbridge and the steaming pile blocks our way.† The guard laughed. Oswald fumed. â€Å"M'lady has instructed me to instruct you that her father's knights are not welcome in the castle.† â€Å"That so? She's actually talking to you, then?† â€Å"I'll not have an exchange with an impudent fool.† â€Å"He's not impudent,† said Jones. â€Å"With proper inspiration, the lad sports a woody as stout as a mooring pin. Ask your lady.† I nodded in agreement with the puppet, for he is most wise for having a brain of sawdust. â€Å"Impudent! Impudent! Not impotent!† Oswald frothing a bit now. â€Å"Oh, well, why didn't you say so,† said Jones. â€Å"Yes, he's that.† â€Å"To be sure,† said I. â€Å"Aye,† said Jones. â€Å"Aye,† said I. â€Å"The king's rabble shall not be permitted in the castle.† â€Å"Aye. That so, Oswald?† I reached up and patted his cheek. â€Å"You should have ordered trumpets and rose petals scattered on our path.† I turned and waved the advance to the train, Curan spurred his horse and the column galloped forward. â€Å"Now get off the bridge or be trampled, you rat-faced little twat.† I strode past Oswald into the castle, pumping Jones in the air as if I was leading cadence for war drummers. I think I should have been a diplomat. As Lear rode by he clouted Oswald on the head with his sheathed sword, knocking the unctuous steward into the moat. I felt my anger for the old man slip a notch. Kent, his disguise now completed by nearly three weeks of hunger and living in the outdoors, fell in behind the train as I had instructed. He looked lean and leathery now, more like an older version of Hunter than the old, overfed knight he had been at the White Tower. I stood to the side of the gate as the column entered and nodded to him as he passed. â€Å"I'm hungry, Pocket. All I had to eat yesterday was an owl.† â€Å"Perfect fare for witch finding, methinks. You're with me to Great Birnam Wood tonight, then?† â€Å"After supper.† â€Å"Aye. If Goneril doesn't poison the lot of us.† Ah, Goneril, Goneril, Goneril – like a distant love chant is her name. Not that it doesn't summon memories of burning urination and putrid discharge, but what romance worth the memory is devoid of the bittersweet? When I first met her, Goneril was but seventeen, and although betrothed to Albany from the age of twelve, she had never seen him. A curious, round-bottomed girl, she had spent her entire life in and around the White Tower, and she'd developed a colossal appetite for knowledge of the outside world, which somehow she thought she could sate by grilling a humble fool. It started on odd afternoons, when she would call me to her chambers, and with her ladies-in-waiting in attendance, ask me all manner of questions her tutors had refused to answer. â€Å"Lady,† said I, â€Å"I am but a fool. Shouldn't you ask someone with position?† â€Å"Mother is dead and Father treats us like porcelain dolls. Everyone else is afraid to speak. You are my fool, it is your duty to speak truth to power.† â€Å"Impeccable logic, lady, but truth be told, I'm here as fool to the little princess.† I was new to the castle, and did not want to be held accountable for telling Goneril something that the king didn't wish her to know. â€Å"Well, Cordelia is having her nap, so until she wakes you are my fool. I so decree it.† The ladies clapped at the royal decree. â€Å"Again, irrefutable logic,† said I to the thick but comely princess. â€Å"Proceed.† â€Å"Pocket, you have traveled the land, tell me, what is it like to be a peasant?† â€Å"Well, milady, I've never been a peasant, strictly speaking, but for the most part, I'm told it's wake early, work hard, suffer hunger, catch the plague, and die. Then get up the next morning and do it all again.† â€Å"Every day?† â€Å"Well, if you're a Christian – on Sunday you get up early, go to church, suffer hunger until you have a big meal of barley and swill, then catch the plague and die.† â€Å"Hunger? Is that why they seem so wretched and unhappy?† â€Å"That would be one of the reasons. But there's much to be said for hard work, disease, run-of-the-mill suffering, and the odd witch burning or virgin sacrifice, depending on your faith.† â€Å"If they are hungry, why don't they just eat something?† â€Å"That is an excellent idea, milady. Someone should suggest that.† â€Å"Oh, I shall make a most excellent duchess, I think. The people will praise me for my wisdom.† â€Å"Most certainly, milady,† said I. â€Å"Your father married his sister, then, did he, love?† â€Å"Heavens no, mother was a Belgian princess, why do you ask?† â€Å"Heraldry is my hobby, go on.† Once we were inside the main curtain wall[25] of Castle Albany, it was clear that we would go no farther. The main keep of the castle stood behind yet another curtain wall and had its own drawbridge, over a dry ditch rather than a moat. The bridge was lowering even as the king approached. Goneril walked out on the drawbridge unaccompanied, wearing a gown of green velvet, laced a bit too tightly. If the intent was to lessen the rise of her bosom it failed miserably, and brought gasps and guffaws from several of the knights until Curan raised his hand for silence. â€Å"Father, welcome to Albany,† said Goneril. â€Å"All hail good king and loving father.† She held out her arms and the anger drained from Lear's face. He climbed down from his horse. I scampered to the king's side and steadied him. Captain Curan signaled and the rest of the train dismounted. As I straightened Lear's cape about his shoulders, I caught Goneril's eye. â€Å"Missed you, pumpkin.† â€Å"Knave,† said she under her breath. â€Å"She was always the most fair of the three,† I said to Lear. â€Å"And certainly the most wise.† â€Å"My lord means to accidentally hang your fool, Father.† â€Å"Ah, well, if accident, there's no fault but Fate,† said I with a grin – pert and nimble spirit of mirth that I am. â€Å"But call then for a spanking of Fate's fickle bottom and hit it good, lady.† I winked and smacked the horse's rump. Wit's arrow hit and Goneril blushed. â€Å"I'll see you hit, you wicked little dog.† â€Å"Enough of that,† said Lear. â€Å"Leave the boy alone. Come give your father a hug.† Jones barked enthusiastically and chanted, â€Å"A fool must hit it. A fool must hit it, hit it good.† The puppet knows a lady's weakness. â€Å"Father,† said she, â€Å"I'm afraid we've accommodation only for you in the castle. Your knights and others will have to make do in the outer bailey.[26] We've quarters and food for them by the stables.† â€Å"But what about my fool?† â€Å"Your fool can sleep in the stable with the rest of the rabble.† â€Å"So be it.† Lear let his eldest lead him into the castle like a milk cow by the nose ring. â€Å"She truly loathes you, doesn't she?† said Kent. He was busy wrapping himself around a pork shoulder the size of a toddler – his Welsh accent actually sounding more natural through the grease and gristle than when clear. â€Å"Not to worry, lad,† said Curan, who had joined us by our fire. â€Å"We'll not let Albany hang you. Will we, lads!?† Soldiers all around us cheered, not sure what they were cheering for, beyond the fact that they were enjoying the first full meal with ale that they'd had since leaving the White Tower. A small village was housed inside the bailey and some of the knights were already wandering off in search of an alehouse and a whore. We were outside the castle, but at least we were out of the wind, and we could sleep in the stables, which the pages and squires had mucked out on our arrival. â€Å"But if we're not welcome in the great hall, then they are not welcome to the talents of the king's fool,† said Curan. â€Å"Sing us a song, Pocket.† A cheer went up around the camp: â€Å"Sing! Sing! Sing!† Kent raised an eyebrow. â€Å"Go ahead, lad, your witches will wait.† I am what I am. I drained my flagon of ale, set it by the fire, then whistled loudly, jumped up, did three somersaults and laid out into a back-flip, wherefrom I landed with Jones pointed at the moon, and said, â€Å"A ballad, then!?† â€Å"Aye!† came the cheer. And ever so sweetly, I crooned the lilting love song â€Å"Shall I Shag My Lady Upon the Shire?† I followed that with a bit of a narrative song by way of a troubadour tradition: â€Å"The Hanging of Willie Wagging William.† Well, everyone likes a story after supper, and by the one-eyed balls of the Cyclops, that one got them clapping, so I slowed it down a bit with the solemn ballad, â€Å"Dragon Spooge Befouled My Bonny Bonny Lass.† Bloody inconsiderate to leave a train of fighting men fighting back tears, so I danced my way around the camp while singing the shanty â€Å"Alehouse Lilly (She'll Bonk You Silly).† I was about to say good night and head out when Curan called for silence and a road-worn herald wearing a great golden fleur-delis on his chest entered the camp. He unrolled his scroll and read. â€Å"Hear ye, hear ye. Let it be known that King Philip the Twenty-seventh of France is dead. God rest his soul. Long live France. Long live the king!† No one â€Å"long lived the king† back at him and he seemed disappointed. Although one knight did murmur â€Å"So?† and another, â€Å"Good bloody riddance.† â€Å"Well, you British pig dogs, Prince Jeff is now king,† said the herald. We all looked at each other and shrugged. â€Å"And Princess Cordelia of Britain is now Queen of France,† the herald added, rather huffy now. â€Å"Oh,† said many, realizing at last at least a glancing relevance. â€Å"Jeff?† said I. â€Å"The bloody frog prince is called Jeff?† I strode to the herald and snatched the scroll out of his hand. He tried to take it back and I clouted him with Jones. â€Å"Calm, lad,† said Kent, taking the scroll from me and handing it back to the herald. â€Å"Merci,† said he to the messenger. â€Å"He took my bloody princess and my monkey's name!† said I, taking another swing with Jones, which missed its mark as Kent was dragging me away. â€Å"You should be pleased,† said Kent. â€Å"Your lady is the Queen of France.† â€Å"And don't think she's not going to rub my nose in that when I see her.† â€Å"Come, lad, let's go find your witches. We'll want to be back by morning in time for Albany to accidentally hang you.† â€Å"Oh, she'd like that, wouldn't she?†